“My Ego”

I’m starting a collage on my bulletin board. “My Ego,” featuring all the fine things in life that are valuable to me. The themes include Diet, Cultural Pastimes, Occupation, Financial Goals, and Social Circle. I will have to formulate each dream, in detail, and gather all the signs, symbols, feelings, tones, and then altogether, these things become an altar piece.

The gift wrapping paper (background) is from Bella Luxe, a brand from which I’ve seen delicate embellishments that usually are neither too wild nor boring. World maps, being one of my favorite prints, awaken my wanderlust and curiosity, and a sense of awe at the various cultures and achievements that humanity has made. Besides, I love Mother Earth too.

The 12-pointed star within a gold disc, I made for Christmas, and I am re-using it because it symbolizes a special blessing. The 6-pointed hexagram (Star of David), within a circle (not without), is said to carry the Maharata/Christ frequencies. I’m not sure what 12-pointed brings, perhaps it includes/unites the parallel worlds? I don’t know. But with it juxtaposed over the worlds, I imagine a sense of infusion. So, all the world becomes sacred… offering more potential for joy and magic.

I obviously still have to add all the other elements. I’m thinking of using sigils which I’m not sure how to make but hey let’s play by ear. Pictures, drawings, poetry, etc…

Everytime I walk by it, I will review, because I, the spontaneous free-wheeler, truly need to be reminded. (I can’t carry on “accepting whatever happens” anymore.) This is part of my Identity, that I am consciously shaping. I hope to enjoy a wonderful, blessed transition… fingers crossed. ♡

Photos by Cielopop

Summer Plans

A regular summer day for me:

Riding my bike for 8 miles to the park, where I’d spend the day meditating and writing. My yellow “Andy Warhol” canvas bag contains a picnic blanket, wholesome food (vegan salad for lunch, 8-oz nutria-smoothie, protein bar, nuts, dried fruit, 16-oz bottled tea, 32-oz bottled water), a sweater (in case I feel uncomfortable with the breeze), a long skirt or dress. Perhaps I should bring a camera along; I feel as if I’m losing precious seconds as I swipe through the smartphone’s menu to find the Camera app.

On my transit, I take photos of stunning moments in the friendly parks that I pass by. Granted, it’s not a hardcore exercise but at least I get my body moving, and I’m breathing fresh air. This is phase one of my exercise routine — just get moving, everyday.

At the park, after I have meditated in the morning, and eaten my lunch, I have the option to take a two-mile hike at the nature center, or run around the park. I’m not too eager to do the latter, so we might expect photos from the hike. Nature is my favorite subject in my photographs. (As well as in my poetry, way back in high school.)

I’m a little apprehensive about my plans for meditating. I get so distracted by the beauty and freshness of the park — I could just take photos all day, experimenting with various angles and degrees of light; or I could just lay down on the grass and gaze at the leaves, listening to the wind’s song, smiling as the sunlight moves across my skin. And I could do this ALL DAY. I am normally this blissed-out, all the time. My whole life could be in shambles, but, alone, in nature, everything else fades away. I’m not sure if this is a good thing. Despite some of my friends’ quests for “transcending the illusion of material world,” I am convinced that it isn’t healthy for me, at least at this stage.

So, did I have specific meditation techniques to complete? My first goal, I suppose, is to find my real Presence, and “WILL.” Presence, meaning, my “I”-ness, which I have to strengthen, as I have grown up rather self-effacing or self-abnegating. And then, to fix my attention problem, develop Focus. I will have to continue meditations using Visualizations. Eventually I will want get to the point where I can feel my subtle body and energetic anatomy.
With writing, what did I hope to accomplish? Well, first of all, I have a list of cognitive biases, and I wish to reduce my tendencies towards these, if possible. That will be one of my subjects. And then, I wish to learn to write creatively – I’m not even sure how to start. I just want to come up with something. Learn alternative means of expression, to learn to deliver my message correctly, to demonstrate a complex idea in pictures and feelings… etc.

So. I hope to make the most of this summer. Yeah.